TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE

TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE gets a reboot on Netflix, and I have to admit I had a lot of fun with this one. What better way to leave Valentine’s Day in the dust than with a good old fashion Chainsaw Massacre? God bless Texas.

Synopsis: Melody (Sarah Yarkin), her teenage sister Lila (Elsie Fisher), and their friends Dante (Jacob Latimore) and Ruth (Nell Hudson), head to the remote town of Harlow, Texas to start an idealistic new business venture. But their dream soon turns into a waking nightmare when they accidentally disrupt the home of Leatherface, the deranged serial killer whose blood-soaked legacy continues to haunt the area’s residents — including Sally Hardesty (Olwen Fouéré), the sole survivor of his infamous 1973 massacre who’s hell-bent on seeking revenge.

#TexasChainsawMassacre is, obviously, Rated R for strong bloody horror violence and gore, and language. It arrives on #Netflix on February 18, 2022

Leatherface has always been scarier to me than Jason, Michael, or that dream creeper Freddie. Growing up in the country around farmlands it was very plausible to me that some deranged, chainsaw wielding lunatic was just waiting in the barn for us to pass by. I even knew a few sketch characters that would fit the bill. This franchise has taken a few bad directions but I still feel the original is one of the best horror films ever.

This one does have major design flaws for sure. I will get into those in a moment. But for me the main attraction is Leatherface, and he has never been more brutal and ferocious than in this one. Even for an old guy. The visual of him with that saw over his head is terrifying and we get a lot of those moments here.

Also, the setting feels very iconic. Set in a dusty, nearly abandoned Texas town that the banks have foreclosed on makes it feel pre-modern age. Take away a few cell phones and it is timeless. The actors – for lack of a better word – also seem classic in nature. So for me those elements helped me to engage and have fun with this watch.

The concept is weak though. Granted I understand the all you need is a reason for a bunch of people to show up in the town. But come on. You give us the concept of a bus load of financial investors coming in to bid on old buildings in hopes of reviving and creating a thriving town. But then the cast look and and act as if they have never had a job and are living in a dorm somewhere. It is fine to have a young, hip, party cast, but make sure the story fits. The only good point is that you don’t feel too bad when they start getting slashed.

And brother, slashed is an understatement. I have already met my yearly blood and gore quota for the year with this one. The violence is extreme. These poor, un-expecting, millennials get a Texas sized dose of the real cancel culture. I stopped counting body parts half way through. So this one is certainly not for the squeamish. For everyone else, I think if you go into this one with the right mindset, just wanting to see an iconic character do his thing, you will be pretty happy.

Be sure to stay through the credits for a nice egg at the end.

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